Absolute power corrupts absolutely.
The final day of contemporary cuisine allowed me to play dictator for a few hours, which turned out to be a lot of fun. I wasn't blasting around the kitchen being an asshole all night, but I was playing the part to the consistent amusement of all. Dave, fellow group 5er, and I made jokes all night about no one doing anything right, screwing everything up. We mock-fired people all night. It was fun. I also spent a lot of time doing my best Chef Ali impression for the kids, which went over big as well. I was definitely on stage the entire 5 hours. Imagine an Iranian accent with a Hispanic lilt: "Shoemakers. If you worked for me, I would fire you, I would kill you, I would aspic your lifeless corpse to the wall."
In all seriousness, getting up to present the menu to the class before we started allowed me a chance to wax extemporaneous about our menu choices, explaining the ideas behind each dish, talking about bold flavor, seasoning and texture as opposed to fat - that was fun, and I was definitely in my element.
By and large, the dishes came out very well, if a little on the spicy side. The class has a spicy bent to it, especially when forced to cook without much fat. Heart-healthy means burn out your goddamn pipes out in this class. The turkey tomatillo chili was a little on the limey side, and blazing hot. The ratatouille was spicier that it should be classically, but not at all to unpleasant effect. Aside from that, the plates were gorgeous and the food was good. Group 2 and Group 4 put out the best menus, I think, but our menu was strong as well.
Here's my largest complaint about Chef Tony. I did a creamy tomato and red pepper soup, which I thought came out just about perfect. At the end of class, as we were breaking down and cleaning up, I asked Chef what he thought of the soup. He said he "didn't get to that one." Whahuh? Then he asked me how it was. Whahuh? Dude, you're the chef. I'm the student. I can think it's great all day long, but I need the impression of someone that's spent a life in the industry, dig? I dead panned him for a few beats and replied, "How was it? That's why I'm asking you." That was the end of the exchange.
At the very end of class, in doing his wrap up of the three weeks, Chef Tony paraphrased Francis Ford Coppola's take on how to be a great director. Coppola says he simply tries to set the scene for great performances and then allow things to happen organically. Chef Tony believes his style in the kitchen to be analogous. Please. Yo, Tony, Coppola doesn't throw a script at an actor that has until now been doing highschool plays and just start rolling, waiting for the magic. Chef, you have a bunch of culinary half-wits banging into furniture and missing cues all night, every night. It's your responsibility to show them the way to do things, to not let their bad habits sink in, so that they may one day find themselves with a true opportunity to craft and create. Your Coppola fantasy is nice, and it appeals to my creative side and all, but come on.
So, this time around, we'll really have 6 weeks off from hot stoves and such. And while I wish we could just cook every single day, my hands can use the vacation. At this moment, as I type this, I count 6 burns of varying levels of healing, half a dozen knife scars that are noticeable. My hands are a mess. And, as I've said before, if you inadvertently grab a hot pan handle while you are sauteing something, there isn't time to stop and bandage it up. If it hurts too much, you switch hands. Or you move on to wine studies and business management stuff.
The final day of contemporary cuisine allowed me to play dictator for a few hours, which turned out to be a lot of fun. I wasn't blasting around the kitchen being an asshole all night, but I was playing the part to the consistent amusement of all. Dave, fellow group 5er, and I made jokes all night about no one doing anything right, screwing everything up. We mock-fired people all night. It was fun. I also spent a lot of time doing my best Chef Ali impression for the kids, which went over big as well. I was definitely on stage the entire 5 hours. Imagine an Iranian accent with a Hispanic lilt: "Shoemakers. If you worked for me, I would fire you, I would kill you, I would aspic your lifeless corpse to the wall."
In all seriousness, getting up to present the menu to the class before we started allowed me a chance to wax extemporaneous about our menu choices, explaining the ideas behind each dish, talking about bold flavor, seasoning and texture as opposed to fat - that was fun, and I was definitely in my element.
By and large, the dishes came out very well, if a little on the spicy side. The class has a spicy bent to it, especially when forced to cook without much fat. Heart-healthy means burn out your goddamn pipes out in this class. The turkey tomatillo chili was a little on the limey side, and blazing hot. The ratatouille was spicier that it should be classically, but not at all to unpleasant effect. Aside from that, the plates were gorgeous and the food was good. Group 2 and Group 4 put out the best menus, I think, but our menu was strong as well.
Here's my largest complaint about Chef Tony. I did a creamy tomato and red pepper soup, which I thought came out just about perfect. At the end of class, as we were breaking down and cleaning up, I asked Chef what he thought of the soup. He said he "didn't get to that one." Whahuh? Then he asked me how it was. Whahuh? Dude, you're the chef. I'm the student. I can think it's great all day long, but I need the impression of someone that's spent a life in the industry, dig? I dead panned him for a few beats and replied, "How was it? That's why I'm asking you." That was the end of the exchange.
At the very end of class, in doing his wrap up of the three weeks, Chef Tony paraphrased Francis Ford Coppola's take on how to be a great director. Coppola says he simply tries to set the scene for great performances and then allow things to happen organically. Chef Tony believes his style in the kitchen to be analogous. Please. Yo, Tony, Coppola doesn't throw a script at an actor that has until now been doing highschool plays and just start rolling, waiting for the magic. Chef, you have a bunch of culinary half-wits banging into furniture and missing cues all night, every night. It's your responsibility to show them the way to do things, to not let their bad habits sink in, so that they may one day find themselves with a true opportunity to craft and create. Your Coppola fantasy is nice, and it appeals to my creative side and all, but come on.
So, this time around, we'll really have 6 weeks off from hot stoves and such. And while I wish we could just cook every single day, my hands can use the vacation. At this moment, as I type this, I count 6 burns of varying levels of healing, half a dozen knife scars that are noticeable. My hands are a mess. And, as I've said before, if you inadvertently grab a hot pan handle while you are sauteing something, there isn't time to stop and bandage it up. If it hurts too much, you switch hands. Or you move on to wine studies and business management stuff.
